2023-10-23 18:15:00
Foreword: definition of sodomy
Sodomy is sexual intercourse which consists of penetration of the anus of the partner with a finger, a sex toy (strap-on dildo, etc.) or a penis. “Sodomy has no gender, sexual orientation or social class” explains Morgane Beauvais, sexologist.
Anal sexuality and sodomy, should they be differentiated and why?
“Anal sexuality is an umbrella term which encompasses several practices ranging from touching the anus, anal caresses, rimming, to penetration of the anus which is also called sodomy” explains the sexologist .
We might also make the same distinction with the term BDSM (Bondage, Domination, Submission, Sado-Masochism) and the practices associated with it such as bondage/shibari, flagellation or even orgasm denial; among others.
Is sodomy only for BDSM fans?
“Not at all, sodomy is aimed at all individuals who have an anus and who wish to practice this. There are also couples who practice BDSM without indulging in sodomy and vice versa” indicates Morgane Beauvais. And despite what we might sometimes think, sodomy was not born with the era of pornography but exists and was already practiced for a long time by our ancestors (Antiquity…).
Why practice anal penetration? Its benefits (pleasure…)
“The advantages of practicing sodomy are numerous as long as the consent of the people involved is free, enthusiastic and irrevocable and none of them have medical contraindications” warns Morgane Beauvais.
- Sexual pleasure : if the man easily reaches orgasm by receiving anal penetration, the woman can also derive pleasure from anal coitus via the small nerves and blood vessels present in this area and also, to everything that is “parameter” to penetration (caresses, seeing your partner having pleasure…).
- Boosted libido: well-done sodomy sometimes goes so far as to boost a couple’s flagging libido if it represents a fantasy of one or both partners but also for its “discovery” side. Partners locked in a sexual routine can in fact discover new sensations and thus avoid possible desires to look elsewhere.
- Alternative au rapport vaginal : when a woman has her period, for example, some partners may be reluctant to use vaginal sex. Anal intercourse is then a good alternative for maintaining regular intimate relations.
- Assurance of not getting pregnant: knowing that it is still quite rare (but not impossible) for sperm to flow and reach the entrance to the vagina, and that this results in pregnancy, sodomy can therefore be an option for those who would like to avoid the risk. For even greater security, we cannot recommend condoms, especially if your relationships are said to be “non-exclusive”. Please note that unless there are medical contraindications and there is consent, sodomy can of course be practiced during pregnancy.
- Finally and also, because it is good for your health! Over the past ten years, multiple scientific studies, carried out in Western or Asian laboratories, have found very concrete virtues in sodomy. “Professor Hannah Engel of the University of Munich explains the benefits of anal sex for those suffering from stomach and intestinal pain because it actually reduces nervous tension and weight on the tissues. Another figure: 2 minutes of sodomy would be equivalent to 30 minutes of jogging due to the movements and contractions felt in the body. Indeed, during jogging or a swimming session, your abdominal muscles strengthen which also promotes intestinal transit.” (source 1).
We can only talk regarding the benefits of sodomy from the moment we listen to our body and that of our partner and take it slowly. Morgane Beauvais, sexologist.
How to (re)try sodomy when you’re not used to it?
For certain reasons, anal coitus is not an easy sexual practice to implement for those who have never tried it or are barely used to it. A fact that can be explained when:
- the partners do not dare to mention their desire for this sexual practice;
- the man or woman refuses;
- the lovers do not know how to go regarding removing certain obstacles relating to comfort and hygiene;
- Fear of judgment from others: “Many men do not dare explore this area for fear of being judged, the same goes for women,” continues the sexologist.
Tips for engaging in anal sex with complete confidence and security
“Without going as far as sodomy, more and more people coming to consult the office tell me regarding the pleasure they have in simply being touched in the anal area (surface caresses)” notes Morgane Beauvais. But if it’s sodomy that really tempts you, here are some tips for getting started without risks even if it’s the first time:
- Take care of your hygiene : to overcome hygiene obstacles, lovers should take care to wash their hands and genitals with clean water. “Be sure to play it down if you accidentally come across small fecal traces, these are things that sometimes happen, it’s normal when exploring this area” reassures the sexologist who then advises to simply discuss it and go take a shower if necessary without making it a taboo. This is something that can happen to anyone and it should not be a hindrance to this moment of sharing.
- Have short nails so as not to create cracks and injure the person concerned.
- Proceed with the act with great delicacy, communication and tact.
- Go crescendo: “Start gently with caresses at the level of the buttocks, then towards the anus in order to relax the partners. Why not, offer anilingus if the desire is there. These elements will allow the anus to dilate before continuing with the penetration of the penis, if there is” – the anal plug is not at all an obligation, it promotes relaxation of the anus and insertion of the penis or object but not everyone uses it ” notes Morgane Beauvais.
- Share the experience : the woman or man receiving anal sex can also stimulate their partner’s prostate. By sharing the experience of anal penetration, the lovers find themselves on an equal footing which possibly favors the anal coitus which follows.
- Use plenty of lubricant : “The anus, unlike the vagina, does not lubricate naturally. It will therefore be imperative to use it sufficiently in order to have pleasant and pain-free intercourse” continues the sexologist.
- Set your limits : stop the practice at the slightest discomfort felt by one of the partners.
The person giving anal sex (the donor) can also take care to surround the act with particularly tender attention, kisses and caresses on the erogenous zones of the recipient (gender and sexual orientation combined).
Do women really like anal sex (studies)?
According to a survey carried out in 2018 by the European Observatory of Female Sexuality and conducted by Ifop, French women are even considered to be fans of sodomy (source 2). Uone in two women have already been sodomized, they are, to be exact, 51% of those questioned. Rimming represents almost a third of those surveyed, or exactly 29%, and all as many have already had ejaculated in their anus. It is also good to see that the women interviewed like to reverse roles.
A quick reminder of the contraindications and limits concerning this sexual practice (STIs, diseases, pregnant women, etc.)
Bacterial infections: if the danger of unprotected sodomy does not lie in an unwanted pregnancy, there are nevertheless other risks of transmission: STIs (Sexually transmitted infections). In case of doubt regarding your partner or yourself and without tests of supporting screening, it would therefore be essential to wear a condom during anal penetration.
Risk of pain: if pain is specific to each person, it is essential to remember that sexual intercourse should not hurt. If this is the case, it may be because there is a lack of lubricant or others, but it must in any case be stopped in order to avoid certain physical or psychological consequences: anxiety, trauma… And also : “avoid positions that endanger the health of intimate partners” adds the sexologist.
We cannot remind ourselves once more and once more of the importance of consent and good communication between partners.
Finally, sodomy should be avoided in the event of specific medical contraindications (proctological problems: constipation, anal fissure, anal fistula, hemorrhoids, etc.).
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