THE ESSENTIAL
- Figuratively, bitterness is a mixed feeling of discouragement and resentment, which one can experience following a failure or disillusionment.
- Rather than rejecting a bitter person, it is better to exercise patience to help them express themselves.
Bitterness is a lasting feeling that mixes both sadness and resentment. If it is often linked to humiliation, disappointment or a feeling of injustice, it mainly affects relationships with others.
What generates bitterness?
While we can all be bitter over the course of our lives, when bitterness sets in, it’s often because sadness and anger are not released as they should be, but are held back for various reasons and turn into resentment. . Disappointment, betrayal or injustice can lead to this feeling.
The bitter person thus remains in the past events during which he experienced difficult emotions which he keeps in a repressed way, resulting in a behavior of rejection which locks him in on himself in the end.
What to do with a bitter person?
By starting by taking a step back from the bitterness of the other, without taking their behavior personally, you open the door to empathy and the possibility for them to express their feelings. Rather than giving in to the urge to reject the bitter person, be patient so they can feel confident enough in the relationship to confide.
Of course, boundaries are also important, and you have the right not to tolerate passive aggressive behavior. But building a relationship with a bitter person doesn’t have to stop there.
Find out more: “Psychology of the feeling of injustice – Understanding and treating suffering” by Vincent Trybou.