Élise Cassan, 19, started writing a book on anorexia when she left her third hospitalization. Through her testimony, the young student from Toulouse wanted to share her knowledge of the disease and her advice on how to get out of it.
This Saturday, September 3, at the Leclerc in Saint-Orens-de-Gameville, Elise Cassan is signing her book “It’s time to relight the stars! Start healing from anorexia”. The young girl, resident of Saint-Orens and student in the preparatory class of biology at the Fermat high school in Toulouse, chose to share her experience to help people suffering from anorexia and their relatives who do not always understand the disease.
How did your anorexia start?
At the end of my second year, I wanted to lose weight even though I was quite thin. I started to watch what I ate and wanted to do more and more sport. My logic was as follows: if you want to eat, you have to compensate with sport. This organization took my mind, I lost 5 kg in one year. When I returned to final year, the general practitioner sent me to the nutrition department of the CHU where the diagnosis of anorexia nervosa was made.
How were you cared for?
I saw a psychiatrist and a psychologist for a few months. But I continued to lose weight and exercise a lot. In March 2020, the decision was made to hospitalize me for a month so that I might pass my baccalaureate with peace of mind. Lockdown came a week later and I went home. There, I did up to three hours of “Hiit” (short and intense sports sessions) a day, including during video lessons. I was 12 kg lighter on the scale, it was almost a third of my initial weight.
And you went back to the clinic?
Yes, at the end of June, for two months in order to properly start the new school year. I had my baccalaureate and was admitted to the physical and biology preparatory class at Fermat. I really wanted to heal but it was difficult for me to accept to regain weight. Despite this hospitalization and food supplements, I was still below the target set by the psychiatrist. I felt like I was at the breaking point, that I had to be hospitalized so I wouldn’t waver all my life.
“Anorexia was a way to protect myself, to keep control”
There, your objective was to heal?
Even if I had the impression of experiencing it as a failure, I accepted the idea of doing a blank school year. It was December 7, 2020, I was planning to go out once I was cured. These four months of hospitalization saved me. It took me a long time to get into care, to get rid of my routine, but thanks to deep psychological work, I managed to dissociate food and sport and to resume a more peaceful life. I needed to understand the disease: why me, why this way? That’s what got me out of it.
What did you understand regarding anorexia?
Anorexia was a means put in place to protect me, to maintain control and also to attract attention. As my brain was always busy with food issues, sports sessions, I did not think of anything that might be anxiety-provoking. Sport was like a drug, I took anxiolytics to settle down.
Did writing this book help you?
I was encouraged by my psychiatrist who told me that I had a rare understanding of the disease. I managed to put words on anorexia. In a month, I wrote everything down, I wanted to share what I had understood with other patients and their relatives, to make them feel guilty, to tell them that it is possible to get out of it. Apollinaire’s quote, “It’s high time to rekindle the stars” suited me perfectly, but as the title was already taken for a novel by Virginie Grimaldi, I adapted it!
How are you today ?
I thought for a long time that anorexia would still be there, now I feel like it’s over. I spent a normal year in prep, I made lots of friends, I went on vacation, I go back to restaurants and I play sports for fun. My goal is to do research in neuroscience…I need to understand how the brain works.
Book signings Saturday September 3 in Saint-Orens
Élise Cassan will be present at the Leclerc in Saint-Orens this Saturday, September 3 for a signing session from 10 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. and from 2 p.m. to 5 p.m.
The book “It’s time to rekindle the stars” (Vérone Editions) is available in several bookstores and in the form of an Ebook.
Site Information www.entamerlaguerisondelanorexie.fr
