Dubai, United Arab Emirates (CNN) — When American actress Jennifer Aniston raised the issue of her struggles with IVF treatments while trying to start a family, she gave a voice to those who went through a difficult journey with infertility that did not end with biological children.
IVF, or IVF, is an assisted reproductive method in which eggs are removed from the ovaries and fertilized outside the body. The resulting embryos were then repositioned into the woman’s uterus in the hope that they would induce pregnancy.
This mechanism is very expensive. Each course of treatment can cost between $12,000 and $17,000, according to one estimate, although in some places they may be covered by insurance.
CNN spoke to four women who have experienced IVF without having children. They describe the agony of daily injections, ultrasounds, and lab work, as well as the long wait, hope, and disappointment, and end with financial pressures and agonizing questions from loved ones and strangers alike regarding why they are not having children.
Katie Sippy, 40, said: “Success stories dominate the current infertility narrative, as people seem to be more willing to talk regarding their experiences as a parent. For those who have closed the chapter on infertility without a child, they always get unsolicited advice. This reinforces the narrative that we gave up early.”
Aniston’s story of involuntarily putting a face on childless people has helped through the deep personal suffering many say they face in silence.
Here is a summary of their experience:
She was overwhelmed with grief following giving up trying to have a baby
Sippy suffered from infertility for four years. In April 2017, she resorted to artificial insemination.
She chose her children’s names and birthing center. She furnished a room in her home in Salt Lake City. But following one cycle of IVF, her embryos were not viable.
The treatment exacerbated her fibroids, which are noncancerous growths in the uterus, and endometriosis, a condition in which the lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus. Sippy then decided not to pursue the second cycle following a reproductive endocrinologist warned her that it would likely lead to a similar result as the first cycle.
For Sebi, the detailed ovulation calendar, obsession with trying to conceive, and the despair of negative pregnancy tests became unbearable. After weighing all of her reproductive health concerns, she decided to end her motherhood journey and have a hysterectomy in 2017, a decision that initially overwhelmed her with grief she described as comprehensive.
“I’m one of the lucky few to have IVF covered by my business, so it wasn’t a financial sacrifice for me,” she told CNN. But I stopped for the sake of my physical, psychological and mental health. My heart almost exploded every time I got my period, and I didn’t know how much I might handle it.”
She began seeing a therapist who told her it was good to put herself first, and helped her deal with the impact of not having a child on her future.
She explained, “I dreamed of motherhood from an early age. I stayed at my job in order to take maternity leave. I always made room for a baby in my life.” She continued, “Through psychotherapy, grieving, and connecting with others in a childless community, I slowly began to create a vision.” new to my life. I chose myself and the luxury of my life over clinging to the hope of having a child.”
The negative impact of the many decisions associated with artificial insemination
When Sherry Lacho decided to undergo IVF, she bought her and her husband a pregnancy magazine, maternity clothes and egg retrieval T-shirts.
Lacho, who lives in Charlotte, North Carolina, had a positive feeling regarding it. She bought regarding a dozen white and gray baby clothes, and two more pink ones, hoping to have a baby girl.
But the two rounds of IVF that she underwent were unsuccessful. The first test resulted in a positive pregnancy test in February, followed by bleeding and miscarriage regarding six weeks later. The second vaccination was done last month, and it was unsuccessful.
Lacho said that the pursuit of a lifelong dream comes with frequent disappointments and requires tremendous strength.
She explained that each stage of her journey involved many decisions, including which embryo to test and how many eggs to implant.
“The hardest part was the decision-making process. There are so many decisions you have to make, starting with the decision to embark on this journey when you are old,” said Lacho, 45. The entrepreneur followed a virtual exercise for coaching and therapy.
Elcho has three children with her husband, but she says she has moments of grief when she thinks of what she has lost. She says she and her husband hope to continue trying for children, but their financial options are limited. Her husband’s job pays for two IVF cycles, but they run out of opportunities.
She pointed out that her husband would have to get another job that would provide him with this possibility once more in order for them to try once more, or they would have to collect donations themselves.
Lacho said people sometimes ask her if she chose not to have her own children.
“Most of them probably don’t realize that infertility is more common than they think,” she added.
Her fetus did not survive.. but she has to pay an amount of $17,000
Megan Hamm, 35, underwent egg retrieval and fertilization in August.
Doctors collected seven mature eggs, and following fertilization ended up with five embryos. But not a single fetus survived.
It was an emotional and financial trauma for Hamm, a customer support agent at a bank in Ontario, Canada. She paid for this process by giving my husband and I our vacations, and getting money from her family.
“The hardest part was feeling like we had five embryos, only to end up with none, and without an actual chance of fertilization,” she says. “It was a severe financial blow as we still had to pay for everything,” she continued.
Hamm noted that the stories of unsuccessful IVF have not been told enough and as a result, most people do not understand what the process entails and how difficult it is. She added that Aniston’s story sheds light on these struggles, and may help reduce the stigma of people who feel judged for not having children.
“There are a lot of people who are not aware of infertility issues, and they have a belief that IVF will cure it,” she continued, stressing that “the concept of IVF for infertility treatment must come to an end. People who share their unsuccessful IVF stories will help others see that this is not Their guilt. It can help others not feel lonely.”
I felt like a failure when IVF didn’t work
April Brisby, 32, had one cycle of IVF in September last year. She says her only mature egg got a C, but it was the only one she had and she hoped it would help her dream of motherhood come true.
Barsby, who lives in Norman, Oklahoma, suffered from endometriosis and a reduced number of eggs, so she pinned her dreams to one egg.
“The hardest part was, all my hopes were eventually dashed, my sweet little egg didn’t stick and my period failed,” she said.
Barsby is not working. So her friends and family donated items to help fund her treatment, which she then sold at a yard sale.
This process drained her and her husband’s finances, and left her struggling to accept her body. The couple has paused IVF, and she admits she’s not sure what to do next.
She pointed out that “my husband is my biggest supporter, and this did not affect our marriage in any way.” She added, “I went through very difficult times for months that I lost my sense of being a woman because of my physical failure.”
Barsby said Aniston’s story would raise awareness of the downside of IVF and the costs to potential parents who go through the experience without having a child. “I’m not sure what the right way to normalize infertility is, but talking regarding it and letting women and men share their stories is a good start,” she added.
