2024-04-24 17:00:19
The number of single people in the world is increasing. In the United States, for example, between 1967 and 2020, the number of “singles” of both sexes increased from 7.6% to 14.4%. And today, regarding 35 percent of the total population of this country is not in a romantic relationship. People choose this lifestyle for a variety of reasons: some following a simple breakup with a partner, others want to focus on their career and personal achievements, and still others remain single because of their beliefs . Scientists from the universities of La Trobo (Australia) and Toronto (Canada) decided to find out more regarding the causes of loneliness. Conclusions regarding their work present в Personality Journal.
Psychologists suggest that many people choose to remain single because of their attachment style. According to attachment theory, there are several types: secure, anxious, avoidant and anxious-avoidant (depending on the classification, these types are often combined in different ways). In general, attachment theory suggests that our relationships with others are determined by the degree of anxiety and avoidance.
The first makes people afraid of being abandoned and unloved, the second makes them uncomfortable with intimacy due to the fact that these people are afraid of losing their freedom and becoming dependent on a partner ( as a result, they literally acquire a “dependence on independence”). Those with low anxiety and no avoidance tend to be most effective in secure attachment relationships. They are comfortable with normal levels of dependence on a partner and are not overly afraid of being abandoned. These people are believed to be in the minority.
The scientists conducted two parallel studies: the first involved 482 young single people, the second included 400 similar, but older, single people. It turned out that the vast majority (78%) of both categories had an insecure type of attachment, and only 22% might boast of a secure attachment. Thus, 37 percent of the subjects were of the anxious type (they were afraid of entering into a relationship because they would be rejected), 23 percent of the young volunteers and 11 percent of the older volunteers were avoidant (these people were prevented from entering into a relationship because they would be rejected). being in a relationship due to the fear of losing one’s independence). Finally, 16 percent of young singles and 28 percent of older singles, on the one hand, felt increased anxiety regarding being abandoned and, on the other hand, they themselves were afraid of losing their independence.
Thus, psychologists have come to the conclusion that although many single people claim to choose this lifestyle because they feel comfortable, in the vast majority of cases there is a fear of relationships or of privacy. However, there are people who are truly self-confident and at the same time feel good outside and in their relationships, but there are much fewer of them than it seems.
Anxious singles tended to worry more regarding being single than others. They also had the lowest self-esteem and life satisfaction of any category. Avoidant singles were the least interested in romantic relationships and seemed satisfied with life.
However, this group had the fewest friends and close relationships in general and, as a general rule, they were less satisfied with themselves and with life in general than people with a secure attachment type. Those who experienced fear of abandonment coupled with fear of losing their freedom reported more difficulty forming close relationships than the secure group. They also had the lowest level of life satisfaction of all subject categories by many indicators.
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