One of the people who has taught me most regarding happiness is my mother. Almost a hundred years old, she never misses a costume party or a get-together with friends. Things that amuse her. As I get older, I learn more from her example and I better understand the importance of happiness. **Be aware of what makes us happy.**
That is a defect of our education. They teach us to be useful people for society and they do not give us the guidelines for something as important as **our own well-being**. That is why what researchers like **Harvard professor Tal Ben-Shahar**.
He is one of the world’s leading experts on **the science of happiness**. He has analyzed happiness from all points of view in order to understand that **it is not something abstract** that appears by chance in our lives, the idea that there are people who are lucky enough to live in a happy world and others who are not.
Where happiness really comes from
We all have our own idea of happiness. We believe, and I say believe because more than one person can deceive themselves, that happiness is provided to us by certain things. Deep down, the mechanisms that lead us to happiness, according to experts, are more common and shared.
Professor Ben-Shahar has even been able to quantify the factors that lead to that happiness. Consider that there is an important part of genetics. Depending on the character of your parents, you will have more options.
- It indicates that it is approximately a 50% of our happiness is determined by the genes.
- Contrary to popular belief, external circumstances, such as wealth, customs or family circumstances hardly affect. They can be a 10% of the reasons for happiness.
- That means that the other 40% is in the attitudes and decisions that we have. Anyone can be happy if they know how to convince themselves that they want to be and act accordingly.
Pleasure and happiness are not the same thing
Another common mistake is confusing pleasure with happiness. “Most people when they think regarding being happy place it in a context of pleasure", explains the teacher. You say to yourself: how nice it was yesterday at the beach or how good the ice cream was.
These are moments of pleasure and they are important.It goes without saying that we should have as many as we can.", he points out. But they are temporary. “It is neither lasting nor deep happiness”, he specifies. Happiness involves much more than pleasure.
There are examples that can illustrate this point. If you see a group of people working with enthusiasm to achieve a goal, they are happy and there is no immediate pleasure in it. On the contrary, Sometimes it requires sacrifice and effort.
Professor Ben-Shahar, who is said to have not had a day without happiness, exemplifies in itself the importance of this broad sense of the term, as attested by the thousands who have followed his lectures in the United States and the rest of the world.
The five pillars of happiness
In order to describe happiness in a much more complete way and for us to understand how to achieve it, this expert had the happy idea of creating an acronym with the five words in which, in his opinion, well-being is based on. It is SPIRE, which in English means spire, the top of a tower. They are the English initials of these Five Pillars of Happiness:
- Spiritual: “It’s regarding being present, being aware”, he explains. It is find a purpose in our lives. Many people experience it through religion. It is not obligatory. Spirituality can also be felt in everyday work if I feel that I contribute something to the world and it is meaningful to me.
- Physical: the relationship between body and mind is basic. Exercise generates endorphins, the hormones of well-being. Half an hour of exercise three days per week will keep us healthier and happier", this teacher recalls.
- Intellectual: keep the mind awake, do not lose the desire to learn. Opening up to new experiences. The end of curiosity brings us discouragement and unhappiness.
- Relationship: spending time with people we care regarding and who care regarding us. “It is the main measure of happiness,” he says. It is related to kindness and generosity, two factors that improve relational well-being.
- Emotional: “It’s regarding learning to deal with the painful emotions, which is a very important part of a happy life”, says Ben-Shahar. And of course, generating and cultivating pleasant emotions, which we already know are an important element of happiness.
Motivational phrases to gain happiness
How do you learn to be happy?
Once you know the theory, the question is how do you put it into practice? Is it necessary to practice, as if it were a school lesson? Does it improve with practice?
Our Harvard professor qualifies that there are activities that bring us closer to happiness and that they can be practiced. “There is a lot of research that shows the benefits of meditation. People who meditate regularly are more mentally resilient and more open to pleasurable emotions.”.
There are many forms of meditation and all of them can be valid to achieve this goal. He even mentions some “informal” forms of meditation. It is enough to be aware of your actions while walking down the street or interacting with a friend.
“The benefits we get from formal meditation and informal meditation are identical”, he explains. The challenge is that it is not so easy to put full attention in what we do without training. Even Zen monks have a teacher who, when he sees them distracted, taps them with a cane. If monks in the monastery need it, imagine us on the street.
One trick Ben-Shahar advises is to have a reminder on the wall of the room. For example, a sign with the word “breathe” or “presence” to remind people of the need for that meditation.
Where happiness really comes from
We all have our own idea of happiness. We believe, and I say believe because more than one person can deceive themselves, that happiness is provided to us by certain things. Deep down, mechanisms that lead us to happinessaccording to experts, are more common and shared.
Professor Ben-Shahar has even been able to quantify the factors that lead to that happiness. Consider that there is an important part of genetics. Depending on the character of your parents, you will have more options.
- It indicates that it is approximately a 50% of our happiness is determined by the genes.
- Contrary to popular belief, external circumstances, such as the wealthcustoms or family circumstances hardly affect. They can be a 10% of the reasons for happiness.
- That means that the other 40% is in the attitudes and decisions that we haveAnyone can be happy if they know how to convince themselves that they want to be and act accordingly.
Pleasure and happiness are not the same thing
Another common mistake is confusing pleasure with happiness. “Most people when they think regarding being happy place it in a context of pleasure“, explains the teacher. You say to yourself: how nice it was yesterday at the beach or how good the ice cream was.
These are moments of pleasure and they are important.It goes without saying that we should have as many as we can.“, he points out. But they are temporary. “It is neither lasting nor deep happiness”he specifies. Happiness involves much more than pleasure.
There are examples that can illustrate this point. If you see a group of people working with enthusiasm to achieve a goal, they are happy and there is no immediate pleasure in it. On the contrary, Sometimes it requires sacrifice and effort.
Professor Ben-Shahar, who is said to have has not had a day without happinessexemplifies in itself the importance of this broad sense of the term, as attested by the thousands who have followed his lectures in the United States and the rest of the world.
The five pillars of happiness
In order to describe happiness in a much more complete way and for us to understand how to achieve it, this expert had the happy idea of creating an acronym with the five words in which, in his opinion,well-being is based on. It is SPIRE, which in English means spire, the top of a tower. They are the English initials of these Five Pillars of Happiness:
- Spiritual: “It’s regarding being present, being aware”, he explains. It is find a purpose in our lives. Many people experience it through religion. It is not obligatory. Spirituality can also be felt in everyday work if I feel that I contribute something to the world and it is meaningful to me.
- Physicist: the relationship between body and mind is basic. Exercise generates endorphins, the hormones of well-being.Half an hour of exercise three days per week will keep us healthier and happier“, this teacher recalls.
- Intellectual: keep the mind awake, do not lose the desire to learn. Opening up to new experiencesThe end of curiosity brings us discouragement and unhappiness.
- Relationship: spending time with people we care regarding and who care regarding us. “It is the main measure of happiness,” he says. It is related to kindness and generositytwo factors that improve relational well-being.
- Emotion. “It’s regarding learning to deal with the painful emotionswhich is a very important part of a happy life”, says Ben-Shahar. And of course, generating and cultivating Pleasant emotionswhich we already know are an important element of happiness.
Motivational phrases to gain happiness
Beyond scientific studies and research, we can explore the wisdom of others who have walked a path towards happiness. Here are some inspirational quotes:
| Quote | Source |
|---|---|
| “Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” | Dalai Lama |
| “The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.” | Nelson Mandela |
| “Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.” | Nathaniel Hawthorne |
How do you learn to be happy?
Once you know the theory, the question is how do you put it into practice? Is it necessary to practice, as if it were a school lesson? Does it improve with practice?
Our Harvard professor qualifies that there is Activities that bring us closer to happiness and that they can be practiced. “There is a lot of research that shows The benefits of meditationPeople who meditate regularly are more mentally resilient and more open to pleasurable emotions.”.
There are many forms of meditation and all of them can be valid to achieve this goal. He even mentions some “informal” forms of meditation. It is enough to be aware of your actionswhile walking down the street or interacting with a friend.
“The benefits we get from formal meditation and informal meditation are identical.”, he explains. The challenge is that it is not so easy to put full attention in what we do without training. Even Zen monks have a teacher who, when he sees them distracted, taps them with a cane. If monks in the monastery need it, imagine us on the street.
One trick Ben-Shahar advises is have a reminder on the wall of the roomFor example, a sign with the word “breathe” or “presence” to remind people of the need for that meditation.
