2023-09-26 04:00:00
A particularly shocking video made the rounds on social networks this weekend. We see the mother of a child, apparently the victim of school bullying, going to find the alleged harasser to take justice into her own hands.
The scene of extreme violence was filmed and broadcast on social networks. From the outset, the mother attacks the child. “ Come here, I’ll kill your bitch. You scratched my son, you » she screams before delivering a first blow to his face. Later, things get even worse when the mother forces the young boy to kneel in front of her son before ordering the latter to slap him. “ Beat him up. Give him a slap in his ass “. Obviously very uncomfortable, the boy complies with a little pat on the cheek of the child who is still on his knees. The slap was not strong enough for the mother’s liking, so she ordered her son to do it once more harder. “Give him a good one.” The video finally ends with serious threats towards the terrified young boy. “ I hear regarding you because you’re being tough at school, I come back and bully you in front of the whole school “. According to Le Parisien, the mother is being prosecuted for violence once morest a minor under the age of 15 and direct provocation of a minor to commit a crime or racial insult.
A particularly French phenomenon
We questioned the office of the Minister of Education, Caroline Désir, regarding the extent of this phenomenon in Belgium and our country seems rather preserved. “This type of phenomenon has not been traced back to us.” notes Jean-François Mahieu, spokesperson.
An observation shared by the educational psychologist, Bruno Humbeeck. “France has made school bullying a political priority, but schools are ineffectively equipped. Schools are all under pressure and do not want to be on the front page of the media. Last week, a boy was taken out handcuffed by the police and it was reported everywhere. Parents no longer hesitate to make a spectacle of themselves“.
My child is being harassed, what should I do?
In this case, what is the correct posture to adopt? “Parent intervention in a school is inappropriate, and would only make things worse” Bruno Humbeeck responds immediately, “you have to talk regarding it at school by transmitting your child’s emotions. The door to the school will open more easily by transmitting emotions than by arriving with this term ‘harassment’ which can be called into question by the establishment. By highlighting your child’s suffering, the school will not seek to question it; we accept emotions as they are.“.
After taking this first step, it is up to the school to act. “It is the school’s responsibility to equip itself to find solutions. Schools are not all equipped but they must know that they can be and I observe that we are moving step by step in the right direction in Belgium. Everything is not yet ready, but we are moving forward“.
If the school does not agree to act or says it is helpless in the face of the situation, “you have to be firm and not give in. Tools exist and it is up to the school to use them“.
As parents, you can also take action.”Above all, you should not minimize or maximize your child’s problems. By minimizing his problems, the child will no longer dare to talk to you regarding them, by maximizing them, he risks thinking he is the source of your emotion, and will close down.“, explains Bruno Humbeeck, also author of the book “School bullying, the guide for parents”.
My child is a bully, what should I do?
The problem also arises for parents of bullying children, obviously. But here too, it is possible to act. “Being the parent of a bully is even more worrying than being the parent of someone who is bullied. All studies show that the future is much less bright for those who harass. You need to draw your child’s attention to the emotions he provokes in others. Do not try to defend his point of view at all costs, this will not do him any favors in his future life and in the development of his emotional intelligence, he will be the first victim.” concludes the research director in the Family Sciences department at the University of Mons.
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