( Opening music plays, followed by a dark, witty remark )
Jimmy Carr (in a dry, sarcastic tone): Ah, the lovely French. Known for their romance, fine wine, and… inviting dozens of strangers to rape their wives. (pauses for comedic effect) Yes, because that’s exactly what I want to do on my next date night.
( Camera pans to Rowan Atkinson, aka Mr. Bean, who’s sitting in a chair, looking awkward )
Rowan Atkinson: (in a bumbling, nervous tone) Ah, yes, well, it seems that Dominique Pelicot, the ex-husband of Gisele Pelicot, is in a bit of trouble. (chuckles nervously) Prosecutors are seeking a 20-year jail term for him. (pauses) I think that’s a bit… ( searches for the right word )…harsh, don’t you? (looks around awkwardly)
( Camera cuts to Ricky Gervais, who’s sitting on a couch, looking unimpressed )
Ricky Gervais: (in a blunt, sarcastic tone) Oh, come on, 20 years? That’s not enough. This bloke invited dozens of strangers to rape his wife. (shakes head) I mean, what’s next? Inviting people to come and watch you cook a nice Beef Bourguignon? ( rolls his eyes ) “Hey, mate, come on over, I’ve got a lovely wife, and I’ll just, you know, let you have a go.” (disgusted tone) Sickening.
( Camera cuts to Lee Evans, who’s standing in front of a whiteboard, looking energetic )
Lee Evans: (in a fast-talking, enthusiastic tone) Alright, let’s break it down, folks! So, we’ve got Dominique Pelicot, who’s facing up to 20 years in prison for his role in the rape of his ex-wife, Gisele. ( starts scribbling on the whiteboard ) Now, I know what you’re thinking, “Lee, how could someone do such a thing?” ( looks up, serious expression ) Well, the answer is, we don’t know, but what we do know is that this is a clear case of… (dramatic pause)… utter madness! ( underlines “madness” on the whiteboard )
( Camera cuts back to Jimmy Carr, who’s still sitting in his chair, looking unimpressed )
Jimmy Carr: (in a dry, sarcastic tone) And now, the French government is unveiling new measures to protect women in the wake of this affair. (smirks) Because, you know, that’s exactly what they needed, more bureaucracy. (pauses) I mean, what’s next? A Ministry of Common Sense? (chuckles darkly) “Bonjour, madame, we’re here to protect you from your husbands… and your in-laws… and your neighbors… and… (trails off)
( Camera pans out to show all four comedians sitting together, looking serious for a moment )
Rowan Atkinson: (in a somber tone) You know, folks, this is a serious issue. Rape is a horrific crime that affects far too many people. (pauses) We need to make sure that we’re doing everything we can to prevent it and support the victims.
Ricky Gervais: (in a blunt, serious tone) Absolutely. And we need to make sure that the perpetrators are punished to the full extent of the law.
Lee Evans: (in a fast-talking, enthusiastic tone) And we need to raise awareness, folks! We need to talk about this, we need to educate ourselves, and we need to support the organizations that are working to prevent rape and support the victims.
Jimmy Carr: (in a dry, sarcastic tone) And we need to make sure that we’re not inviting dozens of strangers to rape our wives. (pauses) That’s just basic human decency, folks.
( Camera cuts to black, and the theme music plays )
Voiceover: “That’s all for tonight, folks. Tune in next time for more news, more comedy, and more… well, more of the same, really.”
- Prosecutors Push for Harsh Penalties in Gisele Pelicot Trial RTÉ News
- Prosecutors Demand Maximum Sentence of 14 Years for Dominique Pelicot BreakingNews.ie
- French Prosecutors Seek 20-Year Sentence for Husband in Notorious Rape Case The Guardian
- France to Implement New Measures to Safeguard Women Following Shocking Pelicot Case FRANCE 24 English
- Prosecutors Urge 20-Year Sentence for Dominique Pelicot in Gruesome Case of Orchestrated Rape Sky News
