Paaradox: Planted | kurier.at

she

It was a long, long time ago that the man across the street wanted to hammer a few nails into the wall to hang a new picture in the living room. And boom, he hit his left thumb with the hammer. In the days that followed, it mutated into a natural spectacle – a new color every day. Until one morning he called: Look dear, finally I have a green thumb! will you marry me now Which was also funny because the good guy never had a botanical streak. He never hid that from me either. When we decided to move in together, he confided in me: I think your ficus yucca gum tree indoor plantation is beautiful, but you have to know that I’m not the flower type. I’ve even tended a cactus to death.

good energy

Newly in love as I was then, I assured him that it wouldn’t be a problem, especially since partners don’t have to share every preference. In return, I then spontaneously confessed to him what I really thought of football. And so it happened that he was able to watch the Champions League while I was allowed to chat with my plants. I was all the more surprised when suddenly there were two potted plants in his nest, which he took with me Allow me, my peace lilies! and commented: You know change is the only constant in life so now I’m interested in houseplants. The two give the room good energy, don’t they? “And when exactly are you going to start painting delicate watercolors and doing a master’s degree in feng shui?” I asked, not without a tiny hint of irony in my voice. But there are also good things: At least I already have a suitable gift idea for his birthday in December: the purchase of an “old man’s head”, Latin: “Cephalocereus senilis”. A branching cereus cactus with characteristic white bristle hairs, which reminds me of an old saying: “Like the gardener, like the garden.”

gabriele.kuhn@kurier.at / facebook.com/GabrieleKuhn60

Is

Yes, there are actually two peace lilies on my window sill. Which, by the way, are also called sheath leaves, which sounds quite paradoxical – maybe that’s why I like them so much. When I recently presented it to my wife (“May I introduce Bea and Trix”), it was a very special moment. Because her speechlessness, which is as common as a snow rose in the Kalahari savannah, was impressively manifested in her facial expressions. Just for this one Should I be worried?-Blick, the purchase of the watering can would have been worthwhile. Conversely, it would be like telling me how much the change of coach at Bologna is bothering her, because it’s not clear what impact it will have on Marko Arnautović’s role (Thiago Motta will certainly change the system too, what do you think?). When she found the words, she reminded me of Thomas Bernhard, whom I once passionately quoted: “Flowers in nature? Yes. flowers in the apartment? No”.

Easy-care

Only then did I admit that the floristic revolution was not the result of a change of life. In the course of which I researched for hours on lonely evenings and considered whether fishtail palm, arrowroot or elephant’s ear might contribute more to my inner peace than lucky feathers, violin figs or lipstick flowers. The truth is simpler. Shortly following I moved in, a neighbor stood in front of my door with the plants, smiled and said: “A green welcome – I have a feeling that you don’t have anything green at home.” Her postscript: “Don’t worry, they are easy to care for”. I said: “Fine, then you are like me”. And thought: “If only Kuhn might hear me now.” She stood there now, plucked off a small withered leaf and said: Nice that you can still surprise me. And I just said, “Well. Speaking of which, fancy Lech Poznan once morest Austria?”

michael.hufnagl@kurier.at / facebook.com/michael.hufnagl9

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