2023-05-12 11:18:00
▲ A good mother suffered from 4 strokes and suffered from end-stage breast cancer, and her filial daughter took care of her for 14 years: Maternal love supports me.
Mother’s Day is approaching, the love for mother in the heart should be spoken out loud! Because life is impermanent, don’t leave regrets. Ah Fei, who has been working as a social worker for the elderly for more than 23 years, suddenly suffered a severe stroke from her mother at the age of 28. In the following 14 years, 4 months and 22 days, Ah Fei gave up her private life without hesitation, and accompanied her terminal breast cancer and three times The mother who suffered a stroke ran to the doctor until the last moment. There are only two words that support her: “maternal love”.
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Ah Fat, born in 1977, was originally named Lu Meiling. Because of her slender fat, her mother gave her this flower name. There are three sisters in Ah Fei’s family, and she is the second. “My mother always said that she loves me the most.” But in fact, Ah Fei should have had an older brother, but because of a medical accident in 1971, the mother lost her child and her body was permanently damaged. The constant surgeries left my mother with scars all over her belly, not even a navel. But in order to support the family, my mother still supports her body and works around the clock. Ah Fei’s heart ached for her mother’s hard work, so she vowed to study hard, to be filial to her mother in the future, and not to let her work hard.
first serious stroke
On September 8, 2005, my mother, who had a physical examination every year and was always healthy, suddenly fainted during a visit, unresponsive and unconscious. The elderly center in charge of the event called Ah Fei, and she only felt that her mother was too busy and caused heat stroke. But when Ah Fei arrived at the hospital and saw her mother being carried out of the ambulance, she felt bad:
The nurse told me to cut up my mother’s clothes for rescue. That dress was something she had been reluctant to wear, saying that it was a mother-daughter outfit that she would only wear on important occasions. It was the first time she put it on that day. The doctor asked me to be mentally prepared that my mother would not survive the night. I was devastated at the time, because my mother was only 62 years old, and I finished talking with me on the phone at noon. How might I give up saving her so easily?
In the end, my mother survived the night with strong will; but she might never stand, eat or walk once more. After examination, it was found that my mother suffered a stroke near the brain stem, which caused the loss of many functions of the body.
Because his family lives in a tenement building, it is impossible for Ah Fei to carry his mother up the stairs to take care of her; the accommodation fee in the private hospital has already used up more than 50,000 yuan in just two weeks, which is too huge. In the end, Ah Fei had no choice but to choose a nursing home and arrange a private place for her mother to take care of her. In the next year and a half, Ah Fei spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on treatments including tongue acupuncture, whole body acupuncture, swallowing therapy, and electric shock therapy for her mother. The process was painful, but unfortunately my mother still mightn’t eat once more. Fortunately, the mother regained her speech function during the treatment. Although the pronunciation was not accurate, Ah Fei might hear clearly.
One night she suddenly looked at me with wet eyes and said, “Fat, you take care of me, you have worked so hard.” I didn’t know how to respond at the moment, and I was very sad, because I felt even more sorry for the hardship she endured…
Ah Fei gave up his private life time, and went to the nursing home to take care of his mother every day following get off work and every holiday. Cleaning the mouth, changing the film, taking a shower, breastfeeding and other nursing work, all of which are done by Ah Fei, regardless of the weather. Even if she was sick and fell together holding her mother’s hand when she was uncomfortable, she persisted. All this, my mother saw it in her eyes and felt pain in her heart.
Re-diagnosed with terminal breast cancer and third-degree stroke
But when he put his mother in the nursing home, Ah Fei didn’t want to stay any longer. She promised her mother that she would take her home. In the middle of 2017, Ah Fei bought an off-plan property, and the new building has an elevator. It is expected that he will be able to move in one year later, fulfilling his promise to his mother. But on September 30, when Ah Fei was helping her mother take a shower, she suddenly felt a hard lump the size of squashed soap on her right breast. As a result, the mother was diagnosed with terminal HER2 breast cancer 2 weeks later.
A normal person suffering from HER2 breast cancer needs surgery, electrotherapy, and targeting, a three-pronged approach. But my mother mightn’t bear it, and in the end I only chose to do targeted therapy for her. Spending money is like pouring water, but it has little effect.
In September 2018, my mother had a second severe stroke in the brain stem, and she was sent back to Caritas Hospital in a coma, but the hospital had nothing to do. Seeing her mother’s condition worsening, the skin on her right breast gradually became thinner, damaged, and festered. Ah Fei described the wound as bloody as if he had been shot 5 times. In February and July 2019, my mother had another third or fourth stroke. She might no longer speak, move, or even close one eye.
I signed the consent form to refuse rescue, because I felt that it was really unnecessary at this time, and let her continue to stay by my side with bruises all over her body.
On December 20, 2019, Ah Fei took his mother, who had a fever and bleeding from the wound, to the “San Ning Home” for dying patients, and spent the last 41 nights with her.
determination to persist
In 14 years, 4 months and 22 days, Ah Fei described her mother as a life warrior; but it was not easy for Ah Fei to take care of her seriously ill mother. The reason for her not to give up is only the word “maternal love”:
Because of mother’s love. When we were young, my mother always tried her best to give us a good life with her limited time and money. If I had to choose once more, I would still not give up treating her, because there is only one mother, and if she loses it, there will be no more. I also know that if the status is changed, my mother will not easily leave me alone. Could it be because she is sick and peeing that she is hurting me? I don’t think so. I would not be where I am today without her, so I will definitely repay and take care of her.
words to mom
Ah Fei didn’t feel relaxed when his mother returned to Tianjia. Missing her all the time, she can only make herself live more fulfillingly, telling herself that she shoulders the mission of her mother. Mother’s Day is approaching. Although Ah Fei often says “I love you” to her mother, she has more words. At this moment, she wants her mother to know:
I hope you can see Ah Fei is strong and brave, and work hard to carry on your spirit. Everything you do to me, I will live up to. My ultimate goal is also to return to you. Hope you will pick me up at Paradise Station and not forget me.
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Reporter: Zhang Pei
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