WHAT’S HAPPENING AT THE BELL CENTRE
Ah, the Bell Centre! It’s not just a place to watch hockey; it’s a shrine where dreams are made and shattered quicker than you can say “offside.” And speaking of dreams, mark your calendars, folks, because it’s Calendar Night presented by Mitsubishi Electric! Yes, the first 10,000 fans will get a—wait for it—a desk calendar! Just what every hockey fan needs: a 12-month reminder of just how often their team can break their hearts. But let’s face it, if you can’t keep track of the Habs game schedule, you might need more than a calendar—maybe a therapist! So arrive early if you want to snag one. The good news? You’ll be among the 10,000 lucky ones who can use it to effectively plan your misery for the rest of the season!
TEAM COMPARISONS
Now, let’s dive into the meat of the matter: the Habs recently experienced a crushing 6-3 defeat to the Penguins. It’s so Canadian family-friendly, it should’ve come with a side of poutine and a heartfelt apology from the players. Montreal did manage to show some spirit—overcoming a two-goal deficit to pull ahead 3-2 in the second period! Fantastic, right? But then the Pens decided, “Wait a minute, why are we losing to these guys?” and proceeded to score four more times, like it was the final act of a tragic play. Samuel Montembeault, bless his heart, finished the evening with 25 saves—because it’s not a proper Habs game unless the goalie is forced to be part-time superhero and full-time piñata.
Across the pond—or should I say, the rink?—the Kings fell to the Maple Leafs 6-2. It’s as if LA has rebranded as a basketball team, only less successful. The Leafs were leading 5-0 before one of the Kings players thought, “Hey, let’s at least get a couple of consolation goals”—and managed to register two. Good, but not good enough! And there we have David Rittich being pulled after letting in four goals on a mere 14 shots. I mean, if you ever feel bad about your job performance, just remember: it could be worse—you could be a goaltender with a save percentage that looks like a misprint!
BY THE NUMBERS: MTL-LAK
Now, the Habs are staring down the Kings with a bit of a history. Their last win against these Pacific Division opponents was back on November 9, 2019! That’s older than the last time someone willingly brought kale to a family dinner. Only three players from that victorious Habs team are still with us: Joel Armia, Brendan Gallagher, and Nick Suzuki. Makes you wonder if they’ve formed a support group for lost souls trying to remember what winning feels like.
Heading into this clash, here’s a fun fact: the Kings have won eight of the last 10 meetings! If that doesn’t feel like a kick in the shin from an old rival, folks, I don’t know what does. It’s like the Kings have put their defense on lockdown while the Habs have been handing out goal-scoring opportunities like they’re Halloween candy!
So grab your calendars, settle in at the Bell Centre, and brace yourselves for what can only be described as an evening of high anxiety, sudden joys, and existential dread—all rolled into one gloriously chaotic hockey game. Let’s hope the Canadiens can channel the spirit of fond memories, at least long enough to give us something to cheer about!