Well folks, hold onto your hats because we’ve got ourselves a classic case of “Kremlin Comedy Gold” out of Russia! You know it’s serious when a top Putin pal goes into a coma after a thrilling high-speed ATV crash—like something out of a bad action movie or an especially dark episode of Top Gear.
Meet Alexei Kostylev, the 39-year-old Kremlin propagandist currently racking up some serious medical bills after his little joyride went hilariously wrong. Reports say he was standing up on his all-terrain vehicle while tearing down the road faster than a squirrel on espresso—what could possibly go wrong? Spoiler alert: everything! He apparently hit a bump (what, no helmets for these guys?) and went airborne before landing face-first in a coma that could make even the most seasoned stuntman cringe.
Now, Kostylev’s injuries? They read like a checklist from a How to Get Injured on an ATV manual: traumatic brain injury, cerebral hemorrhage, broken legs… oh yes, and a fractured neck. You could almost be sympathetic if it weren’t for the fact he was making twisted propaganda videos against the West like a real-life Russian version of Mad Max.
But wait—this gets weirder! Witnesses say the ATV landed on him after he hit the bump. That’s right, he traded in his ‘propagandist badge’ for a one-way ticket to Comatoseville, where the only thing on the menu is regret and unanswered questions!
Officials are staying tight-lipped—essentially playing a real-life game of “telephone”—with different agencies scrambling to present various narratives. Kostylev’s aides are the only witnesses claiming he’s undergoing treatment, while the regional Interior Ministry doesn’t even have a record of the crash. The conspiracy theories are cooking faster than borscht in a Kremlin kitchen!
Not to forget the lovely couple whom Kostylev was visiting, Vitaly and Svetlana Morozov, who have become reality stars of the over-the-top Russian propaganda realm—probably plotting their next video while plotting their escape plans at the same time. The couple and their ten children left Latvia to support Putin like a family reality show gone horribly awry.
“Our thoughts and prayers are with our editor-in-chief Alexei.”
— Readovka news outlet
It’s no wonder that mysterious deaths seem to follow the elite in Russia like a bad fart; this is a regime where falling out of windows or down stairs is almost a rite of passage! Kostylev’s latest drama joins the ranks of suspiciously timed demises, where the only people getting “elevated” are those taking dives from very high places.
In conclusion, folks, whether this crash is just a wild ride gone wrong or another chapter in the ongoing saga of Kremlin intrigue, let’s just say Kostylev might want to consider investing in some sturdy knee pads and a solid lawyer when he wakes up. Stay tuned for the next thrilling instalment of “Who’s Next in Putin’s Game of Thrones!”
A prominent ally of Vladimir Putin is currently in critical condition, lying unconscious in a coma following a bizarre and catastrophic crash that resulted in serious traumatic brain injuries. The public is left to grapple with the unsettling ramifications of this incident, which has ignited a flurry of speculation and concern.
Kremlin propagandist Alexei Kostylev, aged 39, found himself embroiled in a nightmarish high-speed accident when his all-terrain vehicle (ATV) overturned unexpectedly while navigating the roadway. Witnesses at the scene reported the harrowing details of the crash that has since shocked the Russian political landscape.
The Russian official suffered a multitude of severe injuries, including a traumatic brain injury, cerebral hemorrhage, fractures in both legs, and a fractured neck, as detailed by various Russian news outlets. Emergency services rushed him to undergo urgent surgical intervention before transferring him to Moscow for specialized treatment.
Reports from SOTAvision indicated that Kostylev was reportedly standing on the ATV while traveling at an extremely high speed before hitting a pronounced bump in the road, which sent the vehicle crashing into the air. Horrified onlookers described the chaotic moment when the ATV ultimately landed perilously close to him, adding to the urgency of the situation.
Eyewitnesses recounted the scene with chilling detail, including how the ATV landed atop Kostylev while he lay on the ground, necessitating immediate action from those nearby to remove the heavy vehicle off of him. Reports indicated that the severity of his injuries left his face so disfigured that he was rendered unrecognizable.
As the situation unfolded, many Telegram accounts linked to security services sought to discredit the initial accounts of the accident, with VChK-OGPU highlighting that the only witnesses were Kostylev’s aides who were traveling alongside him. This has raised eyebrows regarding the transparency of the incident surrounding the influential figure.
The regional Interior Ministry later noted that they had no official record of the crash, fueling further speculation about the events leading up to the accident. Kostylev was reportedly visiting the family of Vitaly and Svetlana Morozov in the village of Rukhan, reinforcing the ties between Kremlin operatives and influential families within Russia.
Our thoughts and prayers are with our editor-in-chief Alexei
Readovka news outlet
Reports suggest that Kostylev’s team was involved in creating provocative propaganda videos targeting the West as the the Morozov family had recently fled Latvia to align themselves with Putin’s regime. The tragic accident comes amidst a backdrop of unsettling occurrences, as numerous prominent Russian figures have faced mysterious and untimely deaths in recent months.
Last week, Mikhail Rogachev, who held the position of vice-president at the influential oil giant Yukos, was found deceased after reportedly plummeting 110 feet from a window in his Moscow residence. Initial reports claimed he had been battling a severe form of cancer, but this assertion faced immediate denial from his close companions.
Vladimir Lebedev, a war supporter and Russian senator with connections to Lukoil, also passed away suddenly under unexplained circumstances, with his death being described as a “terrible tragedy.” This unsettling pattern of deaths among Russian elites has raised alarm and led to widespread conjecture regarding the safety and well-being of those connected to regime politics.