2023-08-27 02:03:35
In a blink of an eye, it has not been updated for more than 9 months. During this period, it is not that I don’t want to update, and I have written several unfinished drafts intermittently. After thinking about it for a long time, I ruled out several options. I think it should be subconsciously wanting to avoid thinking about cancer. For the past few months I’ve been in a situation where I don’t care if it doesn’t get worse, and if you’re reading this, you can probably be sure that’s the reason, because I’ve been cornered once again, and I’m back to having to figure out how to get on with it problematic situation.
Today is the day I have my first electrotherapy.
▶ Changes in condition in the past 9 months
In fact, the past 9 months were not without good news. A computerized tomography scan in February showed that the largest cancer cell in the lung had shrunk by about half, and other small cancer cells in the lung had almost disappeared.
The left is February, and the right is last year. You can see that the hundred points (cancer cells) in the red frame are about half smaller
Of course, in addition to good news, there must be bad news. At that time, in addition to the chest, the neck was scanned at the same time, and it was found that the spine was also eroded by cancer cells, so an MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) of the entire spine was arranged, and it was found that there were three dangerous places, one of which was far from the core of the spine. The difference was only 0.57 centimeters. The attending physician not only arranged for me to see the doctor in charge of radiation therapy, but also recommended bone-busting acupuncture. After discussing with the radiologist, I decided to continue to observe. Although it is very close to the core of the spine, no one knows whether the cancer cells will continue to move to the core or change places, or even not spread. The main reason is that I didn’t take a spinal MRI before, so I don’t know if the current situation is like this in September last year, or it is the result of continuous spread. Also for this reason, I rejected the doctor’s recommendation and decided not to use bone-busting acupuncture for the time being.
Sectional view of the spine, the eroded part of cancer cells in the red frame
After that, I did two scans one after another (in order to reduce the damage to the body, usually once every three months), each time a small white spot suspected of cancer cells appeared in the lungs, so far a total of two new scans have been added. Fortunately, there are no signs of them getting bigger so far, so continue to observe. The spine was not so lucky. The latest scan confirmed that it was getting worse, so I had to follow the doctor’s recommendation and do electrotherapy for the more serious parts. The rest depends on whether the bone-busting acupuncture is effective.
By the way, electrotherapy sounds like using electricity to treat, but it is actually radiotherapy. The reason why it is called electrotherapy in Taiwan is said to be because the Hokkien language for taking X-rays is called “photoelectric light”. Radiotherapy was misrepresented as electrotherapy.
▶ Start to feel a slight deterioration of the body
In June, I was plagued by colds intermittently for a whole month. Although I used to catch colds every once in a while, it usually got better in a week, and I went to work as usual during the period. Unlike this time, I didn’t have to go to work, I just cultivated at home, instead it took me a month to get better. In the later stage, I also experienced two or three times of stomach pains that lasted for several hours. During the pain, I felt that I had a little more understanding of the hard work of my wife who gave birth to a child.
The scariest thing came in early July. One morning, every time I sneezed or coughed, I felt a sharp pain in my lower back. A sneeze that night seemed to be the last straw that broke the camel’s back. It was a sharp pain, but it lasted for a few minutes. During this period, the pain was so painful that I fell to the ground for a few minutes and couldn’t get up. I could only scream. In the next few days, I needed crutches to help me switch between sitting, standing and lying down, because as long as the right leg muscles were slightly exerted, the right lower back would cause severe pain. Although it will be almost fine in a few days, I still feel slight pain there from time to time. , Later, not only the back, but also the front will also hurt, especially after sitting for a period of time, and there will be a slight throbbing pain when standing up. After a scan, it was confirmed that this part of the bone was not infected by cancer cells. The doctor suspected that it was affected by the spinal nerves, so the electrotherapy later will focus on the spine near the waist.
To be honest, the night when I had severe pain in my right lower back should be the time when I was the most panicked during this period. What I was most afraid of during this period was that I would officially switch from the identity of the caregiver to the identity of the cared for, because I had seen the truth of netizens before. For example, if cancer cells touch the core of the spine, it will be so painful that you can only lie on the bed and cannot stand up. My condition that night was not much different. Lying on the bed, I would feel severe pain when I moved a little, and it was very difficult to get up. Just like many elderly people with disabilities see someone approaching, they will stop and wait for the person to pass by, for fear that the person will accidentally bump into me. On the first day of the attack, I was also very afraid of being bumped, and I didn’t dare to go out at all. I asked my wife to help me buy it, and I only went to the park and supermarket near my home the next day. I didn’t dare to take the bus to a place farther away until the follow-up slowly recovered.
The most intuitive thing that can reflect the above problems is weight. My current weight has dropped from 75 kg to 60 kg. Although it is still within the healthy range (56-69.3 kg), it can be seen from the figure below that from February to April I only lost about two kilograms, but from May to July, I lost about 5.5 kilograms. In the same three months, the speed of weight loss was nearly three times worse.
I have lost about 15kg since the diagnosis
▶ The daughter still doesn’t know that her father has terminal cancer, but she almost passed through the gang two days ago
My daughter doesn’t use earphones when playing with iPads and mobile phones, so whenever she uses these electronic products in the study, no matter what she looks at, it will be forced to my ears. Strange to say, about two months ago, she suddenly came to me and told me that luckily neither of us had cancer, because she watched Youtube videos and knew that the medical bills were very expensive, and she had to shave her head (a sequela of chemotherapy). I heard really mixed feelings. Girl goose, in fact, your dad has already got cancer, but he hasn’t told you yet. I hope the day when I need to tell you the truth will be as late as possible… After that, from time to time, I will hear the word cancer in the video she is watching. Words, after thinking about it, I suspect that I used Youtube to inquire about the sequelae of cancer (the iPad she used was originally used by me, so the Youtube account is mine…). Maybe I should thank the algorithm, at least let my daughter understand what cancer is, so that I can pave the way for me to tell her the truth sooner or later?
Two days ago, when I cleaned up the sundries in my backpack, I accidentally dropped a piece of paper with the words “Cancer Center” on the ground (stupid enough), so my daughter picked it up and asked me why I had this? Fortunately, there is only my ID number on it, but no name. I was very guilty and said that I didn’t know where it came from, and then threw it into the trash can. Looking back on it the next day, luckily my daughter is still young, so such a silly answer was passed (laughs).
▶ Good luck or bad luck?
Ever since I was diagnosed with lung adenocarcinoma, I have thought from time to time, why is my luck so bad? But many other things are lucky. First of all, my tumor is not blocked by other organs, and I can clearly see it on X-rays. Compared with other patients whose tumors are blocked by the heart or bones, they need to wait until other symptoms appear to find out. Already very lucky. Although targeted drugs are not as scary as chemotherapy, there are also many side effects when taking drugs. The common ones are diarrhea and rash. Turning head slowly like a robot. Afterwards, there was only a small lump on the left side of the neck, and the painful symptoms followed me all the time. At a meeting of lung cancer patients two weeks ago, I met an old lady who was taking the same drug. She needed to go to the toilet frequently, so she seldom went out. In contrast, I am very lucky that my life is not hindered by side effects. Although it took a long time for the insurance to be settled, at least the dust has settled in the end. Medical expenses are not a problem, and the living expenses within two years are also settled. That’s why I have been unemployed for such a long time. Although I am a little anxious, at least I don’t need to use my previous savings. After much deliberation, I can only comfort myself in the end, at least I can still live standing up, which is not bad compared to many people.
▶ broken thoughts
I felt dissatisfied when I re-read it after typing it, but I still bit the bullet and sent it out. If I don’t post it, I feel that the probability of continuing to update is even smaller (embarrassed smirk).
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#Lung #Adenocarcinoma #Notes006 #Tumor #King #shrunkGrid #vocus