These days, people have a headache regarding mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. I myself have a daughter-in-law. But for me, it’s very simple. If we just live properly, the children will appreciate it, how can we be strict and regret it later when we get old and when our health goes down?
I gave birth to two children, a boy and a girl. My children are all grown up and married. Because I have a daughter, I always keep one thing in mind, that is, I treat my daughter-in-law well, my daughter will get married to be happy. It is said that virtue is in the model.
My daughter-in-law is also a sensible person. When I was organizing our wedding, I borrowed some money to make them perfect. Maybe my son told me, so the day before, my daughter-in-law came to my room to talk. She handed me a red box and said:
“Mom, we married a total of nearly 3 gold trees. I keep a tree to use when needed. I send the rest to my mother to pay off the debt. Because of the wedding for us, you only owe me, so I want to help you a little.”
Hearing my daughter-in-law say that, I see that she is also a reasonable person. But it is the responsibility of parents to raise a wife and marry a child. How can I hold my daughter-in-law’s gold like that? So I also respond:
“I have debt but not much, at least I will rotate the money and pay it off. And wedding gold is the capital of the children. You just keep it, you don’t have to give it to anyone, not even me.”
My daughter-in-law’s face became lighter. She even thanked me for not being like other mothers-in-law. After that day, my relationship with my daughter-in-law was also a little closer. Whenever I go anywhere, I buy gifts for my daughter like that, so will the daughter-in-law. The reason I did that was because I didn’t want my daughter-in-law to be upset, thinking that my mother was biased.
In the first year of being a bride, she saw that she was sad regarding Tet the most. I understood the meaning, so I called the couple to sit down and talk:
“I think this year, you should go home to celebrate Tet. Mom is alone, it’s sad to talk regarding. But since the two of them got married, it’s been almost 8 months and they haven’t returned to their grandmothers, and grandparents are also sad. This year, if you don’t have to worry regarding children, just come back and have fun.”
Needless to say, my daughter-in-law was very happy. Who doesn’t want to celebrate Tet at their mother’s house? After two years of marriage, my son and I moved out. In fact, there is no friction between the two sides. They just want to be independent and I think that makes perfect sense. I also want to take that opportunity to travel and do the things I love.
We agreed on Friday, my son and I will go home and stay until the end of Sunday. The good thing is that my son bought a house nearby, and has his own car, so traveling is very simple. When my daughter-in-law gave birth, I went to take care of her for the first month.
At that time, I also thought that I would carry him until he was strong enough to go to school. But my age does not qualify for that. I only stayed up one night, but tomorrow, I had such a headache that I had to take medicine. This is something that anyone who is old will understand, sleep is very important to the elderly. Thinking I might not take care of my grandchild’s health, I decided to take out 10 million to give to my daughter-in-law. That money I deducted from the old age pension should not affect other expenses. The day I gave the money, I also declared:
“From now until Titus goes to school, she will provide 10 million per month. The old lady did not know, but the children had to hire someone to look following their grandchildren. But my mother is old, she is dodgy, sometimes taking care of grandchildren is also afraid of making mistakes.”
At first, my daughter-in-law kept her will, so she refused to accept it. But I also said frankly, that mother and daughter together, if I can’t help this one, I will be responsible for another. With that, I also feel at ease mentally. Without giving money to my children, I myself feel irresponsible. When my children need me, I refuse and don’t show up, is that correct?
Then since then, I give money and the children hire help. I come to play with my grandson every 2 days. Because I have already helped, I am also very leisurely, holding it until my hands are tired. And in the evening, I can go home, freely eat and sleep and don’t have to worry regarding waking up and holding my baby because he cries at night. The important thing is that my children are happy too. What’s not to be happy regarding, people? They can both hire people to take care of their children as they like, and their mother-in-law pays all the costs, sometimes with a few million baby diapers left over. If I were a daughter-in-law, I would support this decision of my mother-in-law.
