2023-04-20 12:56:48
Some people never feel satisfied and their pursuit of happiness may seem futile. This can cause suffering. Where does this phenomenon come from and how to manage this chronic dissatisfaction? We posed these questions to Véronique Kohn, psychologist, specialist in couples and romantic relationships. The article below is the transcript of the video embedded in this article.
Chronic dissatisfaction
Indeed, we are in a immediacy society : we want everything, we want the best, we don’t want to miss anything and above all not a fulfilling experience. A trip, an exceptional job. We want the extraordinary and don’t want to miss anything, have fun, “have fun”. So everything, immediately and/or in the very near future. This “always more”, “always better” creates dissatisfaction in us and therefore a gap between what is really possible and what we want, what we dream of.
I’ve often talked regarding this: how dreams prevent us from being in touch with reality. We don’t appreciate the little everyday things, because we seek more. And we get burned with it.
We are damaged by this ideal that we build but that we never question.
Sometimes, dreams prevent us from being in touch with the limit. Therefore we do not appreciate the little things of everyday life. Because we’re actually looking for more, and we’re getting burned with it. That is to say that we are damaged by this ideal that we build but that we never question.
How to manage this dissatisfaction?
And how to be happy? Stop taking yourself for eternal teenagers. Because that’s what teenagers are: I want to have fun, I want the best, but I’m not in touch with the limit. At some point: no, you can’t have everything, so you have to give up. And for teenagers, it’s complicated to accept. We adults are big teenagers in society.
Plato said that desire arises from lack. I find that to be quite true. Once I get the thing I want so badly it’s ‘I got the guy I wanted, I’m happy what now? Next”. Unlimited desires are very human. It is important to examine and know that we work like that and to ask ourselves the question: what do we do with that?
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