THE ESSENTIAL
- The Covid-19 pandemic is emotionally trying for everyone, and for children in particular, recalls Unicef.
- Regularly check in with your child on their feelings. Taking stock means asking him how he is, either directly or indirectly.
The end-of-year celebrations bring their share of good times and relaxation, but also potentially tension and stress. And adults aren’t the only ones feeling it. Indeed, children can also be subject to it, and in them, it manifests itself in different ways, says Schenike Massie-Lambertcoordinatrice de programme du Rutgers Children’s Center for Resilience and Trauma Recovery de l’University Behavioral Health Care, aux Etats-Unis.
The child models his reactions to stress on those of adults
It is first of all the change in environment, routines, mealtimes and bedtime, to which children are extremely sensitive, which can cause anxiety, especially if those around them are also stressed.
“During the holiday season, the environment changes and children are often exposed to caring adults who may be stressed by financial obligations, saddened by the absence of loved ones or overwhelmed by many commitments. How these adults react emotionally to their stress – for good or ill – shapes the expression and management of the emotions of the children around them.”. Indeed, theUnicef reminds us that in times of stress or crisis, children primarily observe the behavior and reactions of adults to know how to manage their own emotions.
Somatization is common in stressed children
It is all the more important to be attentive to your child during this period and to observe any sudden change in usual behavior. Many of them may find it difficult to bring up their emotions and it disturbs them: “instead, children may have physical problems that are not related to a medical condition. It’s common for children who are under stress to report things like stomach aches, back pain, or headaches.”, explains Schenike Massie-Lambert. UNICEF also indicates how recognize the signs of stress in children according to his age.
Dialogue is essential to identify stress in children
To support a stressed child, Schenike Massie-Lambert suggests discussing it with them: “cThis lets the child know that you are engaged, concerned and ready to help”. Talking about his personal emotional experience can also help him express how he feels. In addition, the expert suggests encouraging physical activity to manage stress and release tension in the body – without overloading the holiday program to allow the child to rest.
You can also offer him to express himself through a creative activity such as painting or drawing, indicates theUnicef : “Encourage him to tell you his drawing, to explain to you what he represented or the reason which pushed him to use such or such color. This may help some children talk about how they feel, while others prefer to show their drawing without saying anything; let your child decide”.
A child is able to learn to manage his stress
According to Schenike Massie-Lambert, an effective strategy also involves building resilience and problem-solving skills. “Ask the child to think about previous stressors and what helped them overcome them. Encourage the child to find other solutions. Empower him by inviting him to choose a coping technique, then suggest that he do it together.”
Finally, normalizing and validating the child’s emotional experience, such as telling them that it’s okay to cry if you’re sad or need reassurance, for example, is particularly helpful. “This is another opportunity to reduce the stigma associated with wanting and needing extra help”, conclu la coordinatrice de programme du Rutgers Children’s Center for Resilience and Trauma Recovery.