Daughter of youtube Star Ruby Franke speaks Out in new Memoir
Shari Franke, teh eldest daughter of famed YouTube vlogger Ruby Franke, has broken her silence with a powerful new memoir titled “The House of My Mother: A Daughter’s Quest for Freedom.” The book’s release comes just months after Ruby Franke was convicted of child abuse in December 2023, following a disturbing incident involving her two youngest children.
Early Abuse and the Influence of Jodi Hildebrandt
In her book, Shari recounts a childhood marked by what she describes as “preexisting abuse.” While she doesn’t name her younger siblings, she emphasizes their right to share their own stories when they are ready. She reveals that physical discipline was commonplace before the arrival of counselor Jodi Hildebrandt.
“When I was like five or six, Ruby was really physical,” Shari shared in a recent interview with ABC News. “Whether it was a slap to the lip or slap to the cheek. When I would practice the piano her hand would slam down.”
Shari describes a chilling incident involving her brother, Chad, who received a harsh punishment after cutting off a lock of her hair. Ruby, according to Shari, shaved a thick stripe down the center of Chad’s head, leaving him with a “reverse mohawk” and stating, “Maybe next time you’ll think twice before you decide to play barber’.”
Shari claims that the physical abuse subsided after Hildebrandt entered the family’s life, but the discipline became more psychological. Hildebrandt, a licensed mental health counselor, began weekly therapy sessions with the family.Shari was initially heavily influenced by Hildebrandt, but her outlook shifted when the counselor moved into their home, forcing Shari out of her own bedroom.
“The vibes I was getting were strange between them,” Shari admitted, describing her growing discomfort with Hildebrandt’s presence and influence within the family.
In her book, Shari paints a stark portrait of Hildebrandt: “A repressed, self-loathing, deeply damaged woman trapped in an environment in which she felt compelled to conceal her true nature.Surrounded by women she couldn’t have.”
Shari’s book and interviews offer a glimpse into the complex and troubled family dynamic that unfolded behind the scenes of the popular “8 passengers” YouTube channel, leaving readers to grapple with the questions of abuse, manipulation, and the lasting impact of a deeply dysfunctional family environment.
Shari Franke: A Story of Neglect, Uncertain Forgiveness, and Hope for Recovery
Shari Franke’s new book delves into the harrowing experience of growing up in a home where neglect was woven into the fabric of everyday life. Shari, who recently announced her engagement on Instagram, is choosing to step back from public life after bravely sharing her story. Her narrative sheds light on the complex issues surrounding child neglect and the challenges of seeking justice when the lines are blurred.
Calling for Help: A System Strained
Shari recounts numerous attempts to report the situation to authorities, but she encountered roadblocks due to a Utah law enacted in 2018. This law, intended to grant children more autonomy, allows them to walk to school or play unsupervised, which sadly led to unclear interpretations and hindered investigations into potential neglect cases. As shari explains, the law’s vagueness created unintended consequences.
The District Attorney ultimately determined there wasn’t enough concrete evidence to pursue abuse charges, leaving Shari and her siblings feeling unheard and unprotected.
A Chilling Call and the Fear of the Worst
In August 2023, Shari received a heart-stopping call from a neighbor informing her that police were at her mother’s house. The weight of unimaginable horrors flashed through her mind. “Tiny body bags being carried out of my mother’s home,” she remembers thinking.
Relief washed over her when she learned her younger siblings were found safe, but the trauma of the experience lingered.
Reconciliation: A Distant Horizon
Shari grapples with the question of whether her mother truly understands the gravity of her actions. “What she has done is so bad, I don’t think her mind allows her to fully comprehend the guilt of all that,” she reflects. “So, I think she probably genuinely believes everything she said. I don’t believe it though.”
While Shari is choosing to move forward with her own life, focusing on her fiancée and embracing privacy, her father, Kevin Franke, has publicly stated his commitment to supporting his youngest children in their healing journey.
A Mother’s Apology: Words Without Closure
In a poignant end to her book, Shari reveals that her mother penned a letter apologizing only for not spending enough time with her before she left for college. Both Shari and Kevin have chosen not to respond, leaving the question of reconciliation hanging in the air.
How does the normalization of dysfunctional family dynamics on social media platforms contribute to the potential for abuse and the difficulty for victims to seek help?
Archyde Exclusive Interview: A Conversation with Dr. Emily Carter,Child Psychologist,on Shari Franke’s Memoir and the Impact of Family Trauma
By Archys,Archyde News Editor
In light of Shari Franke’s powerful new memoir,The House of My Mother: A Daughter’s Quest for Freedom,Archyde sat down with Dr. Emily Carter, a renowned child psychologist and trauma specialist, to discuss the implications of Shari’s revelations and the broader societal conversation about family dynamics, abuse, and healing.
Archyde: Dr. Carter, thank you for joining us today. Shari Franke’s memoir has sparked a national conversation about the hidden realities of family life, especially in the context of social media fame. What are your initial thoughts on her story?
Dr. Carter: Thank you for having me. Shari’s memoir is a valiant and deeply personal account of her experiences. What stands out to me is her ability to articulate the complexities of growing up in an surroundings where abuse was normalized, both physically and psychologically. Her story sheds light on how family dynamics can be distorted,especially when external influences,like Jodi Hildebrandt,enter the picture.
Archyde: Shari describes a shift from physical abuse to psychological manipulation after Hildebrandt became involved. Can you explain how this kind of transition impacts a child’s growth?
Dr. Carter: Absolutely. Physical abuse is often more visible and easier to identify, but psychological abuse can be equally, if not more, damaging. It erodes a child’s sense of self-worth, autonomy, and trust in their caregivers. When a child is subjected to psychological manipulation,they may internalize the belief that they are inherently flawed or unworthy of love. This can lead to long-term issues like anxiety, depression, and difficulty forming healthy relationships.
In Shari’s case, the introduction of Hildebrandt seems to have created a new layer of control. The fact that Shari was forced out of her own bedroom to accommodate Hildebrandt is a stark example of how boundaries were violated, further destabilizing her sense of security.
Archyde: Shari also mentions that she was initially influenced by Hildebrandt but later grew uncomfortable with her presence. How common is it for children to be swayed by authority figures, even when those figures are harmful?
Dr. Carter: It’s very common. Children are naturally inclined to trust adults, especially those in positions of authority or those who are endorsed by their parents. this trust can make it difficult for children to recognize harmful behavior, notably when it’s presented as discipline or guidance. Over time, as Shari did, a child may begin to sense that something is “off,” but by then, the psychological damage may already be done.
Archyde: shari’s memoir also touches on the role of social media in masking the reality of her family life. How do you think platforms like youtube contribute to the normalization of dysfunctional family dynamics?
dr. Carter: social media can create a dangerous dichotomy between public perception and private reality. Families like the Frankes, who presented a curated, idealized version of their lives, frequently enough feel pressure to maintain that image at all costs. This can lead to a culture of silence and denial, where abuse is hidden to preserve the family’s reputation. For children, this can be incredibly isolating—they may feel that no one will believe them if they speak out, or that they are betraying their family by doing so.
Archyde: Shari’s younger siblings have not yet shared their stories. What advice would you give to families or communities supporting children who have experienced similar trauma?
Dr. Carter: First and foremost,it’s essential to create a safe,nonjudgmental space for children to express themselves. Healing is a deeply personal journey, and each child will process their experiences in their own time. it’s also crucial to provide access to professional support, such as therapy, to help them navigate their emotions and rebuild their sense of self. For communities, it’s about fostering empathy and understanding, rather then judgment or sensationalism.
Archyde: what message do you hope readers take away from Shari’s memoir?
Dr.Carter: I hope readers come away with a deeper understanding of the resilience of the human spirit. Shari’s story is not just about abuse; it’s about survival, self-revelation, and the courage to break free from cycles of trauma. It’s also a call to action for all of us to be more vigilant about the signs of abuse, both physical and psychological, and to advocate for the well-being of children in our communities.
Archyde: Thank you, Dr. Carter, for your insights. Shari Franke’s memoir is undoubtedly a catalyst for vital conversations, and your expertise helps us better understand the psychological dimensions of her story.
Dr. Carter: Thank you for having me. It’s a privilege to contribute to this dialogue.
For more on Shari Franke’s memoir and the ongoing conversation about family trauma, visit Archyde.com.
