Storms and Shenanigans: Northwest’s Wild Weather
By Your Favorite Comedic Meteorologist
Hold onto your hats, folks! The Northwest just got hit by a storm that’s stronger than my will to avoid a bad pun. What was billed as one of the most robust storms in decades lumbered into Seattle on Tuesday night and, boy, did it not disappoint! If you thought 2023 was the year you could escape the craziness, think again. Mother Nature just said, “Not today!”
The Climate Prediction Center, not known for their flair, issued warnings for excessive rainfall—what’s next? A thunderstorm level podcast?—set to pelt the area from Tuesday to Friday. We’re not just talking about your average rain shower here; this storm is categorized as “bombogenesis.” What, did they run out of names and just combine ‘bomb’ with ‘genesis’? Next, we’ll be having ‘Hurricane Nate Dogg’.
According to Richard Bann, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service, the most affected regions are primed for a delightful deluge. He assures us “there’s going to be a shocking event.” I hope he meant the storm and not that bowl haircut he’s sporting!
Winds that Will Have Your Hair Flying
Now let’s talk about the winds. We’re looking at hurricane-force gusts of 74 mph or higher. That’s the kind of wind that makes you rethink your life choices, or at least your choice of hairstyle. If you’re along the Oregon coast, brace for it—your wind-blown selfies are about to elevate to ‘extreme’ levels! And in Seattle? Oh, expect some low-elevation wind gusts knocking out power and sending trees into an existential crisis. No more pine-scented candles—they’ll be scented like ‘Tornado Trouble’.
Power Outages That Make Your Wi-Fi Feel Like an Apocalypse
About 94,000 customers in Western Washington were left in the dark by Tuesday night, while over 12,000 in Oregon discovered just how dark their living rooms can really get. It’s like a real-life horror movie: “The Wi-Fi Is Down!” Picture it: you’re stuck inside, contemplating your life choices without that delightful stream of cat videos. It’s imperative you build up essential survival skills—like making coffee on a campfire or finding someone who hasn’t lost power yet!
The winds didn’t just whisper; they shrieked, as evidenced by a reported maximum wind speed of 68 mph at Crystal Mountain near Mount Rainier. “Wow!” they said, “This is gonna be pretty strong!” If you’re wondering, “What’s strong?” Well, assume a bull on roller skates trying to hold on to a cotton candy machine. That’s strong!
Floods, Snow, and All That Jazz
As if being powerless isn’t enough, flood warnings are in full swing, and we can expect up to eight inches of rain in parts of the Bay Area. I don’t know about you, but I’ve always thought that was just a trendy new nail service—“Bay Area Translucent Glow, please!” Meanwhile, a winter storm watch has been issued for the Sierra Nevada, promising 15 inches of snow and winds gusting over 75 mph. Forget skiing; you might need a snowplow just to step outside in the morning!
SEATTLE – A powerful storm, anticipated to be one of the most severe to impact the Northwest United States in decades, arrived late Tuesday, wreaking havoc with widespread power outages and downed trees throughout the region.
The Climate Prediction Center issued urgent warnings for excessive rainfall, effective from Tuesday through Friday, as the most potent atmospheric river of the season, bringing long, moisture-laden columns from the Pacific, looms ominously over the region. This storm is classified as “bombogenesis,” a phenomenon where a cyclone undergoes rapid intensification, leading to extraordinary weather conditions.
Richard Bann, a meteorologist with the National Weather Service’s (NWS) Climate Prediction Center, stated that areas anticipating particularly heavy rainfall extend from the southern Portland, Oregon region to the northern reaches of the San Francisco metropolitan area. “Be aware of the risk of flash flooding at lower elevations and winter storms at higher elevations. This is going to be a shocking event,” he emphasized, underscoring the potential severity of the storm.
According to the NWS in Medford, hurricane-force winds, defined as gusts of 74 mph or greater, could significantly affect the Oregon coast. Meanwhile, forecasters indicated that western Washington was primed for intense low-elevation wind gusts, further exacerbating the risk of power outages and uprooted trees, as noted by Larry O’Neill, director of the Oregon Climate Service and an associate professor at Oregon State University.
“This is going to be pretty strong in terms of the last 10 or 20 years. We’ve only experienced a couple of storms that have truly matched this level of intensity,” O’Neill remarked, hinting at the historical significance of this weather event.
As the storm escalated, approximately 94,000 customers found themselves without power in Western Washington, compounded by strong winds and snowfall in the Cascade Mountain passes. In Oregon, more than 12,000 residents reported power outages, according to poweroutage.us.
The NWS in Seattle recorded a maximum wind speed of 68 mph at Crystal Mountain, situated near Mount Rainier, with expectations of escalating winds across western Washington overnight. Flood warnings and high wind alerts were also issued in Northern California, where rainfall amounts could reach up to eight inches across the San Francisco Bay Area, the North Coast, and the Sacramento Valley.
A winter storm watch has been activated for the Sierra Nevada above 3,500 feet, forecasting as much as 15 inches of snowfall within a two-day window, with wind gusts potentially exceeding 75 mph in elevated mountain regions, according to forecasters.
“Numerous flash flooding, hazardous travel, power outages, and tree damage can be expected as the storm reaches its maximum intensity” on Wednesday, the Climate Prediction Center cautioned, advising residents to prepare for the brunt of the storm.
This story was translated from English by an AP editor with the help of a generative artificial intelligence tool. A Telemundo editor reviewed the translation.
How can humor play a role in communicating weather warnings to the public?
### Interview with Meteorologist Richard Bann
**Editor:** Welcome, Richard! Thanks for joining us amidst all this wild weather chaos in the Northwest. Let’s dive right in—how does this storm stack up against others you’ve seen in recent years?
**Richard Bann:** Thanks for having me! This storm is definitely among the most severe we’ve seen in decades. The classification of “bombogenesis” basically means it’s rapidly intensifying, which is why we’re expecting such extreme conditions. It’s like Mother Nature decided to flex her muscles!
**Editor:** You mentioned “shocking events” in your warnings. Can you elaborate on what residents should brace themselves for?
**Richard Bann:** Absolutely. Folks should definitely be prepared for flash floods, especially at lower elevations from Portland down to the Bay Area. And higher up? Winter storm conditions could drop upwards of 15 inches of snow in mountainous areas. If you’re at home, it might be a good time to cozy up with a blanket and hope your power stays on!
**Editor:** Speaking of power outages, I hear about 94,000 customers in Washington and 12,000 in Oregon were left without power. What should people do in these situations?
**Richard Bann:** Great question! First, stay safe—avoid downed power lines and trees. It’s also wise to have emergency supplies ready, including extra batteries, non-perishable food, and, of course, your survival kit for entertaining yourself in the dark! Maybe catch up on that book you’ve been meaning to read.
**Editor:** And what about those hurricane-force winds you mentioned? Any tips for those who live in areas that might be hit hardest?
**Richard Bann:** Yes, those winds can be really dangerous. I’d advise securing outdoor furniture and any loose items that could become projectiles. And if you’re near the coast, expect some real “wind-blown” drama! Nothing creates great social media content quite like a blown-off hat, right?
**Editor:** On a lighter note, we couldn’t help but notice your humor throughout these dire forecasts. Is there a place for levity when discussing such serious weather events?
**Richard Bann:** Definitely! Humor can be a great way to cope with stressful situations. I believe it’s important to inform people about the serious nature of these storms while also reminding them that we’re all in it together. A shared laugh can lighten the mood, even when the forecast is stormy.
**Editor:** Well said! Any final thoughts for our listeners as they gear up for the storm?
**Richard Bann:** Stay informed, be prepared, and try to find joy in the chaos. Whether it’s raindrops or a bit of snow, Mother Nature always has a way of reminding us who’s boss. And remember, if the lights go out, consider it an unplanned camping trip!
**Editor:** Excellent advice! Thank you, Richard, for sharing your insights today. We’ll all be watching closely as this storm unfolds. Stay safe out there!
