HAVE you ever felt your emotions explode during an argument with your partner and found it hard to control yourself? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. A new study reveals that the solution to defusing tension in a relationship may be simpler than you think: it only takes a 5-second break!
Research conducted by the University of St. Andrews in Scotland shows that by taking a five-second pause, couples can defuse negative emotions and reduce aggression during conflict.
The study, published in the journal Nature, involved 81 couples and highlights how even a short time away can have a big impact on a relationship.
How was this research conducted?
Researchers created conditions for conflict between couples by having them participate in a competitive game.
In this game, each couple is given the opportunity to send an unpleasant sound to their partner at a volume of their own choosing.
After receiving the sound, the couple must wait for five, ten, or fifteen seconds before deciding how loud a sound they will send back.
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During this waiting period, their facial expressions were recorded and analyzed using machine learning technology.
The results of the study showed that short pauses, whether five, ten, or fifteen seconds, were all equally effective in reducing negative emotions and preventing aggressive behavior.
Although it sounds simple, a five-second pause is enough to help the brain do a small “reset” and calm peak emotions.
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Why is a 5 second pause effective?
According to Annah McCurry, the study’s lead researcher, five seconds gives the brain enough time to calm down and avoid an impulsive response.
McCurry said he was surprised by the results, considering they initially thought five seconds would be too short.
“However, the results show that this short time was enough to reduce tensions,” he said.
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These findings are particularly relevant to everyday conflicts that commonly occur in relationships, such as arguments about household chores or other minor issues.
However, McCurry stressed that these results do not apply to situations involving domestic violence, which require a more serious approach.
The views of other experts
Psychologists not involved in the study also support the findings.
Mariko Visserman, assistant professor of psychology at the University of Sussex, explains that a brief pause can help a person see the situation more clearly before responding.
“When emotions run high, taking a break allows us to think more rationally,” Visserman says.
Janet Reibstein, a clinical psychologist at the University of Exeter, adds that couples are often highly reactive to each other because their relationship means so much to them.
This five-second pause, he says, can be a simple way to avoid impulsive and emotional responses.
Although the results of this study are promising, there are several limitations that need to be considered.
Most of the participants were students who were not yet living together or married, so the results may be different if applied to couples who have been living together for a long time.
Additionally, the majority of participants were white, so reactions from different cultures may not be fully reflected in this study.
A five-second pause may sound trivial, but the results of this study suggest that this short time could be the key to maintaining harmony in a relationship.
If you feel emotions running high during an argument with your partner, try taking a break. This may be the simple step you need to ease the tension and prevent the argument from getting worse.
If it doesn’t work, at least you’ve lost five seconds, but if it does, you can repair your relationship in a simple and effective way. (Z-1)
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