The Congolese Minister of Gender, Family and Children, during a morning event organized on July 9, 2024 in Kinshasa, announced her intention to relaunch the debate on the issue of dowry within parliament, churches, civil society organizations and among the general public, with a view to restoring its symbolic character.
Opinions differ. For some, the dowry represents a symbol of alliance and recognition of the woman’s value. Others see it as a barrier to marriage for young men from disadvantaged backgrounds, as its exorbitant cost can delay or even prevent couples from getting married.
Thérèse Mujinga, mother of 8 children including 5 girls, fears that dowry regulations will mislead couples and bring a curse to their homes. She believes that each family is free to set the dowry for their daughters as they see fit.
« The amount of the dowry varies according to the regions, ethnic groups and socio-economic conditions of the families. The question of its determination is therefore up to each family, according to its own realities and aspirations. I fear that its regulation will create frustration within families and lead to marriages without parental blessing. This would be very unfortunate.” she says, offended.
Read also: Dowry law in the DRC: the mixed opinions of Kinshasa women
For his part, Steve Bwema, a law graduate, deplores the fact that dowry can expose women to situations of vulnerability. He pleads for families to become more aware.
« Girls are not commodities. The exorbitant cost of dowries can be a major obstacle to the union of couples, delaying or even preventing them from realizing their life together. This practice also exposes women to situations of vulnerability, placing them in a position of dependency and inferiority. It is crucial that families realize that the value of girls cannot be reduced to a sum of money or a list of material goods. Even in ancient times, dowries had a symbolic dimension and signified the commitment of the future husband to his future wife and his family.«
(Re)read: Dowry law in the DRC: “we should not remove the beauty and symbolic character of kinzonzi from our customs”, Solange Masumbuko
Hortance Yeko, an economics student, saw her marriage annulled last year because of a dowry deemed exorbitant.
» The issue of dowry deserves special attention because it seriously hinders the happiness and fulfillment of women and couples. This customary practice, supposed to symbolize union and mutual respect, often turns into an insurmountable obstacle, shattering dreams and life plans. Last year, my marriage was annulled because of a dowry deemed exorbitant by my fiancé’s family. The list given during his presentation was disproportionate, and despite my attempts at dialogue, my voice was not heard. Today, this man has married elsewhere, leaving behind immense bitterness and deep frustration. “, confides the young girl.
Jonas Bokete, father of five children including two girls, fears that this debate will weaken family ties and expose young women to abuses.
« Dowry is an important tradition that helps preserve cultural values and ensure the stability of the couple. I fear that too strict regulation will trivialize marriage and encourage young women to adopt a less serious attitude towards their commitment. Any regulation of dowry could lead women to question their duty of submission and fidelity to their husbands. ” he said.
Read also: Dowry law in the DRC: “it is unconstitutional to submit its modification to the National Assembly”, Christelle Vuanga
For her part, Cathy Mena, a literature graduate, criticizes the dowry as it is perceived today: a source of pressure and injustice.
« We women aspire to marriages based on love, mutual respect and freedom of choice. However, reality often confronts us with excessive financial constraints that hinder our aspirations. Social pressure can push us to seek out wealthy men who can meet the expectations of our families and those around us. This quest can lead us to neglect men who sincerely love us, but whose financial means do not meet the expected standards. We find ourselves torn between our aspirations and societal constraints, between true love and external pressures..
Rose Tite, mother of three boys, sees the relaunch of this debate as a positive step towards a constructive evolution of the practice.
“By taking into account the aspirations of the younger generations and finding the right balance between tradition and modernity, it is possible to make the dowry a positive symbol of alliance and mutual respect, rather than an obstacle to marriage and the emancipation of women.”
Reread: Dowry law: “if all families considered the dowry as a symbol, the question of the sums would not pose any problem”, Adolphine Kabedi
The debate on dowry in the Democratic Republic of Congo is complex and raises important questions. The relaunch by the Minister of Gender opens the way to a deep and inclusive reflection to evolve this customary practice towards a fairer model that respects women’s rights.
/actualité.cd
2024-07-24 21:06:37
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