2024-02-17 17:00:51
“Addictions entered my life from my childhood, with great trauma. First through my father’s alcoholism and, in its wake, parental arguments and the distress of my mother, whom I found one day on the point of hanging myself, at the end of my strength. Added to that what my memory had repressed for years: the rapes committed by the neighbors’ son, aged 16. They resurfaced during my first consultation for excessive alcohol consumption At the age of 11, I started smoking tobacco, encouraged by a “big girl” at school. From then on, I also smoked with my father, on Sundays, in a moment of sharing, important for me. As a teenager, Saturday dances evenings are an opportunity to get drunk on beers. Already at that time, I did not know how to moderate my consumption, to the point of making myself sick. At 16, I smoked my first cannabis joint. Calmed down, I might not feel nothing anymore, I forget my suffering. This effect hooks me immediately. It will stay with me for 25 years. Cannabis was the most difficult product to quit.
Having become a nurse, I give the change
Over time, I oscillate between hatred for my father and my desire to communicate with him, to love him, to rediscover the admiration I felt for him as a child. Him, so courageous, so kind, always ready to help his neighbor. I wanted to become a nurse to save him. At the hospital as with my family, I keep up the pace, I deploy considerable energy to (…)
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#finally #freed #addictions