Drawing of a 97-year-old mother.. Tears of a middle-aged daughter, why?

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The last child love is to prevent dementia… In her 97-year-old mother’s diary, the middle-aged youngest daughter rediscovers ‘her mother’s love’. [사진=게티이미지]

Middle-aged Mr. A brings tears to his eyes whenever he sees the back of his 97-year-old ‘mom’. Her mother, who is regarding to turn 100, draws pictures and keeps a diary every day. She is not an idle hobby. It is my own ‘dementia prevention method’ to do my best for my children. She uses a pencil and draws on paper the things she did that day. In the form of a diary, write down what you did from morning to evening. Her mother says it helps her retain her memory, she is pleased.

A is the youngest daughter among three daughters and one son. Her children, from her four siblings, grew up mostly in the care of her grandmother. She took care of her two grandchildren until she was in the third grade of elementary school for her son and daughter-in-law, who were both busy working together. Her daughters often left the children in the care of her mother. The two children of Mr. A also passed through the hands of her mother. He once said, “Her mother is like the head of a daycare center.” Now that I think regarding it, that was a very immature remark. How hard it must have been for her mother to take care of so many grandchildren…

When her grandchildren were able to go to school alone, her mother left her home in Seoul and moved to the countryside. Her deceased father repairs the home of her father and lives alone. He is quite far from Seoul, so he can’t go often. I found out belatedly the reason for her mother’s move, who rejected her children’s dissuade. “My grandkids are all grown up, so my job is done,” she said. I don’t want to burden my children anymore.” Drawing pictures and writing in a diary every day was the result of discussions with experts, fearing that their children would suffer greatly if they got dementia.

A mother who devoted her whole life to her children is now making every effort to overcome the last ‘wall of dementia’.

According to the Central Dementia Center, as of 2021, 890,000 people are suffering from dementia. This number accounts for more than 10% of the nation’s population aged 65 and over. It is predicted that by 2024, the number will exceed 1 million. The proportion of women among dementia patients is regarding 62%, nearly twice that of men (38%).

Why are there so many women with dementia? A theory that is attracting attention these days is related to estrogen (female hormone). This hormone is known to protect nerve cells in addition to blood vessels and bones in women. It is argued that when this protective film is removed due to menopause, problems with cognitive abilities such as memory occur following depression and depression due to abnormal nerve cells.

In fact, the rate of depression in women is more than twice that of men. As a result of a survey of 2938 people (1279 males, 1659 females) over the age of 65 in Korea, the rate of depression in women was 8.6%, more than twice that of men (3.7%) (Journal of the Korean Dietitian Association). Women’s life expectancy is 86.5 years, which is longer than men’s (80.5 years), but they suffer from various diseases during that time. ‘Healthy life span’ (healthy longevity) has become more important than ‘longevity’ with a long period of illness.

Dementia is a terrible disease that destroys the peaceful daily life of the person as well as the family. People who were respected when healthy can become objects of resentment if they suffer from dementia for a long time. A person who has been self-restraint all his life for the sake of honor faces great difficulties at the end of his life. There are three main causes of dementia. About 70% is Alzheimer’s disease, and regarding 20% is vascular dementia, which is a sequelae of stroke, and alcohol-related dementia caused by excessive drinking. Vascular-alcoholic dementia can be sufficiently prevented by lifestyle management such as smoking cessation, diet control, and exercise.

Menopausal women have a very high risk of stroke following menopause, when estrogen, which protects blood vessels, disappears. The possibility of vascular dementia is also increasing. Treatment of depression in old age is also very important to prevent dementia. Depression must be taken according to the prescription of a psychiatrist. It is absolutely not an illness that can be overcome with mental strength. In particular, the shorter the sleep time due to sleep disorders, the higher the risk of cognitive function deterioration due to the accumulation of dementia-causing proteins in the brain.

Mr. A’s mother’s drawing and diary help prevent dementia. This is because every day, the memory of the whole day is retrieved, cognitive function is revived, and hands are used. Work using detailed hand movements such as knitting is good for preventing dementia (Korea Centers for Disease Control and Prevention). Some people memorize the names of dozens of national mountains every morning. The prevention of dementia that has been confirmed so far is exercise. In addition to regular exercise, you need to move your body diligently. If you lie down or sit comfortably for a long time, the risk of dementia as well as other diseases increases.

The mother, who has lived her life fiercely, is winning the fight once morest dementia, the ‘last danger’. Even at the age of 97, she has a clear memory. She even memorizes the names of her grandchildren who appear in her diary almost every day. Ms. A sheds tears when she sees her mother’s slightly bent back. As her youngest child, she monopolized her mother’s love, what did I do for her mother… Her mother even installed an emergency bell to contact her neighbours, just in case.

The mother repeats, “Now, the last love for children is to prevent dementia.” Her immature youngest daughter, Mr. A, has also reached an age to worry regarding her dementia. Through her mother’s paintings and diaries, she realizes ‘mother’s love’.

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