Before, I always thought that, in love and marriage, a woman should trust and love the man she chooses. Believe that as much as you give to your husband, you will receive as much or even more.
So I gave my husband everything I had without knowing that it was a very foolish act.
Until I realized it was too late, my marriage had come to an end and might not be saved anymore.
So, sisters, absolutely don’t go in my footsteps and give everything to your husband, especially these 3 things.
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1. Career
Before I got married, I used to have a stable job with a not so bad salary. But when I was pregnant, my husband advised me to quit my job and stay at home to take care of my pregnancy. Although I mightn’t bear to, but because of the child in my stomach, I had to sacrifice my career, always believing in my husband’s saying: “You stay at home and take care of your pregnancy, I’ll take care of you”.
Then, within a few months, my husband showed an unpleasant attitude towards me, especially when I bought supplements. He blamed me for wasteful spending, not knowing how to save money, not knowing how to love my husband. Even when he was drunk, he blamed me for not eating, being a “parasite”.
I’m pregnant with your child, talking at home, but the housework from washing, cooking, etc. I do it, almost as his full-time nanny, yet he has the heart to say such words. That’s cruel to me. Since that moment, I realized that I was wrong to give up my career to take care of my family, if I had a job, even if I had a small income, maybe he wouldn’t have looked down on me like that.
Moreover, when I go out to work, my life is not just around the kitchen anymore. I will be exposed to a lot of knowledge, new things, my life will be much more interesting.
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2. Freedom
After giving birth for 6 months, I found a job and went back to work, determined not to let my husband look down on me anymore. However, when I have a job, every day I only know the way from home to the company, from the company to home, on weekends, I also go to my grandmother’s side, my grandmother’s party or go out with my family.
In general, I never dare to accept the invitation to go to coffee, gather with friends to let my husband and children eat every meal, instead always take care of everything, even setting aside my personal preferences. I also do all the housework, not letting my husband touch it. I think that if I do this, the more my husband will appreciate it, the more obedient the children will be and the happier the family will be.
But I was wrong, my husband became more and more dependent, thinking that what I was doing was obvious and he did not need to share and help. My social relationships are also narrowed, all day knowing only work, family and children makes me suffocated, secretive and more irritable.
After that, I gradually changed, coaxing my husband to do housework with me, sometimes leaving him at home with children to go out with friends, travel with the company. Struggling with children and housework alone, he gradually began to love his wife more.
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3. Money
I thought my married life would be long and happy from now on, but suddenly my husband lost money in the stock market and owed a big debt. I took out all my savings and dowry to pay my debt, the goal of my work is also to earn money to pay my husband’s debt, never leaving a single penny for myself.
Having trouble, husband and wife shoulder it together. I thought that sacrificing so much for her husband, he would appreciate and be more grateful to his wife. But when the debt was paid off not long ago, I received lightning once more: My husband was having an affair and wanted a divorce. The two of us don’t have a house, the savings in the past few years are also used to pay off the debt for my husband, so following 5 years of marriage, I only “interest” each child.
“Money goes with the intestines”, a woman must know how to hold and manage money in the family. Create for yourself a “black fund” so that if something happens later, at least there is still a way to retreat. Moreover, when you have money in hand, you will be more comfortable and safe.
Marriage cannot be maintained only by love but also by reason!